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February 2016
n
Beachwood Buzz
9
February 2016 Beachwood Buzz
3
With February's
being the month
of love and
relationships, let's
take time to focus
on what's really
important, whether
in a relationship
or not, and that's
self-love. Three
Beachwood women
share information
that they often use
in their careers.
Meet Dee Wolk,
founder and creator
of No Diet Weight
Solution®; Jennifer
Stern, licensed
independent social
worker in private
practice; and Lisa
Copeland, dating
coach, speaker and
author, all of whom
have eye-opening
messages to share.
It's All About
Self-Love
This Valentine's Day
Should Start
With YOU!
Love ­ A Time to Reflect on One's Self
When Dee Wolk mentions love, she shares the
following about inner reflection.
If you realize that you are not your sports car,
your grades, your children's grades, your degrees,
your spouse's degrees, your titles, your family's
titles or your possessions, congratulations! Raise
your glass and toast yourself. You are an amazing
person and it's time to have a love affair with
yourself. You don't have to look and wait for
someone else to love you when you love yourself
first.
Let's not mistake the identity of self-love. It
has nothing to do with being egotistical, putting
yourself first or always getting your way. Self-love
is to be in awe of the miracle of your existence,
and how you treat yourself shows others how to
treat you. Self-love has nothing to do with what
you have achieved, what you look like, or what
people think of you. It's all about your right to
love yourself and become your own best friend.
The relationship you build with yourself will
always be there. If you feel lonely, it is your self's
wanting to make friends with your self. It's about
loving yourself enough to ask yourself, "what do
you need?"
Self-love encompasses mind, body and spirit.
Your immune system is only as strong as the dose
of self-love, self-acceptance and self-care that
you administer to yourself daily.
When people deeply love others without
loving themselves, relationships can eventually
falter. Your relationships will only be as strong
and enduring as the foundation of your self-love,
for everything begins from the inside out.
"Here is my gift to you this February ­ a Valen-
tine solution," Wolk says. "The only relationship
that solves your problems is the relationship
you have with yourself, which is your core, your
wholeness, your strength and your authenticity!
This is inside yourself ­ use it and nurture it. Self-
love will never let you down or abandon you.
"When you celebrate this love, you will then
have the abundance to love others. Self-love
starts with believing in yourself. Your subcon-
scious mind believes whatever you tell it ­
whether true or false. This concept is so powerful
that it will ultimately control your destiny.
"Self-love cannot be bought anywhere. It is
FREE and you can have it if you consistently pro-
gram your subconscious positively.
"We are not born winners. We are not born
losers. We are all born choosers. February is the
month of love and Valentines. Choose to give
yourself a Valentine of self-love every day and
miracles will happen!
Dee Wolk is an author, speaker, columnist and creator of the No
Diet Weight Solution®. Her program is taught in hospitals, cor-
porations, schools, privately, in-person classes and live webinars.
She can be reached at www.nodietweightsolution.com.
Making Meaning Out of a Hallmark Holiday
Jennifer Stern, LISW, shares her insight about
giving meaning to a Hallmark Holiday.
I am sorry, hopeless romantics, but please,
on this Valentine's Day, take the notion of `you
complete me' and put it where it belongs ­ in a
fictional love story, a Hollywood movie.
The truth is that YOU must be whole before
you can do the work it takes to maintain a
healthy and strong relationship. You must first
know and like yourself. After all, how can you
teach someone else how to meet your needs if
you cannot first identify and meet them for your-
self? How can you expect someone else to know
what makes you happy if you do not know how
to be happy on your own?
It is unreasonable to expect someone else to
know how to care for you if you do not know
how to care for yourself. Relationships are hard
work. Couples that have relationship strength
are constantly renegotiating the terms of their
relationship. They continuously check in with
each other. They recognize that love is a
verb not an adjective.
This Valentine's Day, instead of (or in
addition to) a romantic dinner, consider reading
and discussing Gary Chapman's book, The Five
Love Languages. In his book, he describes how
we tend to love our partner in the way we wish
to be loved (our love language) rather than how
they wish to be loved (their love language).
Whether or not you are in a relationship, it's good
to be aware of this information and to know your
own language.
There are five love languages in all: Quality
Time, Acts of Service, Words of Affirmation, Phys-
ical Touch and Receiving Gifts. At the end of the
book, there is a quiz that helps identify what your
primary love language is. Once you know what
each other's primary love language is, you can
better understand and meet each other's needs.
To love and be loved is one of life's greatest
blessings. Start with yourself first and then you
will be ready to do the work it takes to have and
maintain a healthy relationship.
Jennifer Stern is a lic ensed independent social worker, and loss
and bereavement specialist. She can be reached at 216.464.4243
or www.ellenfcasperphd.com.
Dee
Wolk
Jennifer
Stern